I’m So Unorganized

I’m so unorganized I can’t find myself

Sometimes I feel I really need help

If only I could just clone me

I could be all the things I wanna be

But I’m lost trying to do it all

Trapped by boundaries and walls

And I can’t stop from wanting more

Doing so much not knowing what for

I don’t even understand why I write

Why I work every day and every night

Maybe for my family who don’t care to see

Until I go to jail, THEN they notice me

It ain’t for my friends cause friends become foes

I don’t dress to impress, it ain’t for the clothes

I ain’t a player so it ain’t for the girls

I ain’t a hero so it ain’t for the world

I wasn’t born here so it ain’t for the country

It ain’t for the joy cause I still feel grumpy

I ain’t in love so it ain’t for my wife

It ain’t for any particular person in my life

I ain’t gay so it ain’t for a guy

I ain’t a lawyer so I ain’t gotta lie

I ain’t a scientist so it ain’t for chemistry

It’s the present so it ain’t for history

Or maybe it is and I just ain’t aware

If I ain’t ever recognized I really don’t care

I’m still unknown so it ain’t for the fame

Others feel the same so it ain’t all in vain

I’m so unorganized I can’t find myself

Sometimes I feel I really need help

If only I could just clone me

I could be all the things I wanna be

But I’m lost trying to do it all

Trapped by boundaries and walls

And I can’t stop from wanting more

Doing so much not knowing what for

I don’t even understand why I paint

Why I try to do so many things I cain’t

Maybe for the same reason I write poetry

Maybe I do it to leave a legacy

Maybe I do it all for the future

So somebody’s mind will be nurtured

Maybe I do it to try to educate

I might have a point I want to illustrate

Maybe I put art and poetry together

So some of my work will last forever

Maybe I’m addicted to work and success

The triumph, failure and the stress

Maybe for my kids, nieces, nephewsand grandkids

I want them to know the things that I did

Maybe it’s to inspire the younger generation

Maybe they’ll hear me before my elimination

Or maybe I’ll be like other poets, artists and rappers

Who ain’t ever heard of until after their disaster

Maybe I dream of become legendary

Maybe they’ll remember me when I’m buried

Maybe my works of art will be past down

To the kids, kids, kids from town to town

And maybe some hope will be reached

When they read the lessons I teach

Maybe this is all my destiny

Maybe it’s just all meant to be

I’m still unknown so it ain’t for the fame

Others feel the same so it ain’t all in vain.

10/5/2006, 9:10 PM